Still, no writing inspiration..Ugh.
However, I’ve had enough to keep me busy this week. A continuation of the virus put me in the emergency room on Saturday when I decided breathing was a necessary prerequisite to making it though the week. Also, I had two important presentations this week. Both came with some demanding prep time and gathering my thoughts outside of my Robitussin fog.
The presentations couldn’t be more different, yet the same. In the first presentation, I addressed a group of successful CEO’s and discussed the topic of employee engagement. My intention was to help them understand that free soda, snazzy benefits and even a good manager is not enough to get folks jazzed about work. That instead, it’s an inside job on the part of the employee. The call on that day – help employers to understand their role is to help employees to find their own wizard within.
The second group was a group of unemployed individuals brought together by the Jewish Business Association in Seattle. Sixteen people showed up at this event, as well. Again, the topic – how to get what you want and wake up to our own excellence. In some ways, this should have been a tough crowd – but I felt confident, my message flowed, and I felt deeply inspired to lead this group in a conversation that could change their current reality.
Though the results were equally successful, I can’t wonder why my emotions were so different about the two distinct target audiences. Before addressing the CEO group, I was ravaged with feelings of anxiousness and just plain exhausted from playing the movie of the presentation in my head. I finally just reasoned that my intentions were similar for both – to have them thinking differently about how to get what we all want – happy folks in the workplace. Folks who love life, and work.
Here’s what I learned about my passion – my calling, my purpose…I want to work with people who are interested in helping themselves. I want to be one-person away from the person who needs the messages, the strategies…the tools to change their life. I can certainly spend my time convincing CEO that they can awaken their workforce – but I question if the business world is ready for a conversation about creating a conscious workforce?
What does this tell me about myself or what I am called to do? Is it time to wake up my wizard within…
Friday, July 24, 2009
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Vision for the Future
Today, I scheduled an unscheduled session for the group. Creating vision boards. We have just wrapped up creating vision statements for each area of our life and noting the things we want to realize for ourselves.
Now, when I think about vision boards it just makes me smile. When I left the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, a group of my colleagues created a vision board for me as a final act of appreciation. These are professional women who don’t necessary believe in the process of visualization, so it was this act of unselfishness that touched me so much. The funny thing was that they called it an “art project”, as almost an avoidance of what the process really symbolizes. It just makes me snicker to envision this group of women with glue sticks, an empty canvas and cutting out inspiring quotes and pictures to make the collage that represented my contribution to our important work. The end result offers daily inspiration.
A vision board is nothing more than creating a visual representation of what we want in life. The whole premise is that when we commit to something and when we evoke emotion based on our beliefs that we can get what we want…it attracts those things to us. The law of the Universe is that like attracts like. Don’t laugh – its quantum physics. It’s really that simple.
Only four of us are able to make it today. As folks walked through their boards, it was fun to hear what they wanted for themselves and to see their excitement. Ironically, one person confesses that she told her husband that we were doing “a girl’s art project.” Though I know she will need to confess when she arrives home with two amazing pieces of artwork, it makes me think about how we can all get more authentic and comfortable in our journey. Are we willing to shed the perceptions of what other people think, and follow what we are called to do?
This is an ironic thought because I am stuck this month – big time - with my writing. I wonder if I am being authentic to my true calling. The chapter topic this month is purpose and I realize this feels too big right now to write about. Maybe it’s because I feel stuck. This is evident in my effort to finish my board today. I am feeling some dissonance in the direction my work is taking on the corporate side, and how this dovetails with my purpose. My calling. Since I am stuck, my writing is waiting for me to catch up. My vision board will need to wait until I can get clear on what I want, I guess.
Am I being authentic to what I am being called to do? How will I know?
Now, when I think about vision boards it just makes me smile. When I left the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, a group of my colleagues created a vision board for me as a final act of appreciation. These are professional women who don’t necessary believe in the process of visualization, so it was this act of unselfishness that touched me so much. The funny thing was that they called it an “art project”, as almost an avoidance of what the process really symbolizes. It just makes me snicker to envision this group of women with glue sticks, an empty canvas and cutting out inspiring quotes and pictures to make the collage that represented my contribution to our important work. The end result offers daily inspiration.
A vision board is nothing more than creating a visual representation of what we want in life. The whole premise is that when we commit to something and when we evoke emotion based on our beliefs that we can get what we want…it attracts those things to us. The law of the Universe is that like attracts like. Don’t laugh – its quantum physics. It’s really that simple.
Only four of us are able to make it today. As folks walked through their boards, it was fun to hear what they wanted for themselves and to see their excitement. Ironically, one person confesses that she told her husband that we were doing “a girl’s art project.” Though I know she will need to confess when she arrives home with two amazing pieces of artwork, it makes me think about how we can all get more authentic and comfortable in our journey. Are we willing to shed the perceptions of what other people think, and follow what we are called to do?
This is an ironic thought because I am stuck this month – big time - with my writing. I wonder if I am being authentic to my true calling. The chapter topic this month is purpose and I realize this feels too big right now to write about. Maybe it’s because I feel stuck. This is evident in my effort to finish my board today. I am feeling some dissonance in the direction my work is taking on the corporate side, and how this dovetails with my purpose. My calling. Since I am stuck, my writing is waiting for me to catch up. My vision board will need to wait until I can get clear on what I want, I guess.
Am I being authentic to what I am being called to do? How will I know?
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Reframing Unflattering Beliefs
I find myself in a cloud this weekend. I’ve been really sick for the second time this summer, and I wonder what this is trying to bring my attention to…but, that’s not why you are reading this blog…so, I’ll move on.
I woke up today with some energy for the first time in a week. I opted to attend a monthly support group that gets my attention intermittently. The group is comprised of alum from the personal effectiveness seminar I attended a few years ago, which I highly recommend by the way. There was something telling me to get my ass out of bed, so against the better judgment of those who love me – I was off to gather with a group of almost perfect strangers with my benign cough in tow.
There were eight of us who showed up on this marvelous summer morning. As I walked through the door, I decide that am going to participate fully and push myself outside of my comfort zone. That alone is enough to regret my decision as I sit down in the circle of chairs. But I was called to attend this morning because there is something inside me that is resisting the progress I want for myself, so I see this morning as a vehicle to look for clues. And aha – our focus today is on beliefs – limiting beliefs. Those nagging beliefs that get in the way of living the life we deserve. A coincidence, you say? I think not.
UGH, at the announcement of the topic, I feel a wave of nausea roll me around. The feeling takes me to a visceral memory of being pulled under a wall of water as I innocently entered the ocean for the first time when I was a child. I was lost in the waves and wondering if I would ever find air again. For a split second, I contemplate leaving.
But I stay. We are asked to write down three limiting beliefs we have about ourselves. At first, I tell myself I am confident and don’t have any negative thoughts rolling around in my head any longer. Then I get real with myself and decide to be more vulnerable. It’s like I am undressing in front of these people, but then I realize – they are getting naked too. (Not literally, but figuratively – of course.) And, I write on one of my cards, “showing my emotions makes me vulnerable.”
A belief starts with a passing thought or an experience. But, it’s when we start making decisions to support this new truth that we make this belief true in every cell of our being. As I write my belief, a memory of me crying as a child comes into my mind. I couldn’t tell you how old I was, but I remember my mom telling me, “now, I know how to get you to take a nap in the middle of the day.” On that day, I remember telling myself I wouldn’t cry anymore. In fact, I’d spent many years holding back my emotions because I thought I needed to be strong. Or, maybe it was about control. Obviously, this was still plaguing me today even though I feel I’ve made good progress over the years.
We spend the rest of the day reframing our beliefs to create an inner dialog that is more productive. The first step was for someone to read my words to me – as if they were their words. When they came from someone else’s mouth, the statement seemed just silly. Of course that wasn’t true! Then we went around the room and we were offered a counter-point - or reframe – to our beliefs. Though I left with many, my favorite is “I am safe & I am loved; I risk being all of me all the time.”
Signing off – the strong and vulnerable me.
I woke up today with some energy for the first time in a week. I opted to attend a monthly support group that gets my attention intermittently. The group is comprised of alum from the personal effectiveness seminar I attended a few years ago, which I highly recommend by the way. There was something telling me to get my ass out of bed, so against the better judgment of those who love me – I was off to gather with a group of almost perfect strangers with my benign cough in tow.
There were eight of us who showed up on this marvelous summer morning. As I walked through the door, I decide that am going to participate fully and push myself outside of my comfort zone. That alone is enough to regret my decision as I sit down in the circle of chairs. But I was called to attend this morning because there is something inside me that is resisting the progress I want for myself, so I see this morning as a vehicle to look for clues. And aha – our focus today is on beliefs – limiting beliefs. Those nagging beliefs that get in the way of living the life we deserve. A coincidence, you say? I think not.
UGH, at the announcement of the topic, I feel a wave of nausea roll me around. The feeling takes me to a visceral memory of being pulled under a wall of water as I innocently entered the ocean for the first time when I was a child. I was lost in the waves and wondering if I would ever find air again. For a split second, I contemplate leaving.
But I stay. We are asked to write down three limiting beliefs we have about ourselves. At first, I tell myself I am confident and don’t have any negative thoughts rolling around in my head any longer. Then I get real with myself and decide to be more vulnerable. It’s like I am undressing in front of these people, but then I realize – they are getting naked too. (Not literally, but figuratively – of course.) And, I write on one of my cards, “showing my emotions makes me vulnerable.”
A belief starts with a passing thought or an experience. But, it’s when we start making decisions to support this new truth that we make this belief true in every cell of our being. As I write my belief, a memory of me crying as a child comes into my mind. I couldn’t tell you how old I was, but I remember my mom telling me, “now, I know how to get you to take a nap in the middle of the day.” On that day, I remember telling myself I wouldn’t cry anymore. In fact, I’d spent many years holding back my emotions because I thought I needed to be strong. Or, maybe it was about control. Obviously, this was still plaguing me today even though I feel I’ve made good progress over the years.
We spend the rest of the day reframing our beliefs to create an inner dialog that is more productive. The first step was for someone to read my words to me – as if they were their words. When they came from someone else’s mouth, the statement seemed just silly. Of course that wasn’t true! Then we went around the room and we were offered a counter-point - or reframe – to our beliefs. Though I left with many, my favorite is “I am safe & I am loved; I risk being all of me all the time.”
Signing off – the strong and vulnerable me.
Monday, July 13, 2009
My Beliefs about New York
I find myself with a free afternoon in downtown New York and I am struck with a wave of concerns regarding a few members of the group. Where most are making awe-inspiring progress, there are some outliers that have captured my thoughts today.
One shows up, but isn’t fully engaged in the work. As a result, there is minimal progress and a cloud of personal disappointment that joins us in the room whenever she arrives. I want to help. Hold her hand. Shake her to wake up, but I know we all hold the key to our own progress. Another is struggling with a shadow. It has followed her for years. It has become her companion and nemesis. Though it wears the mask of a jester, it will sometime unveil itself when she’s all alone – keeping her from offering her true beauty and gifts to this world. It keeps her goodness looking small in her own eyes. Yet another is sidetracked by her ability to open up to different ways of thinking and being. The question – what stops them -- all of us, at different times – from listening to our hearts and changing our path?
It strikes me that New York, in some ways, is the perfect environment for today’s contemplation. No, really. My husband and I have talked about spending more time in New York to see if it’s a place we might want to hang out once we get closer to retirement. We love Seattle, but New York has been calling my husband’s name ever since he decided to take a free ride for graduate school and pass up attending NYU; his only regret in life, he says.
As I think about the group, my thoughts wonder to visions of living in New York. I keep asking myself if I can be authentic, contemplative and who I am in New York, or whether I would lose myself in all the chaos, excitement and noise. You have to admit, there are mountains of distractions in New York.
Then it hits me, it’s my beliefs about New York that are getting in my way – not New York. This seems so ironic because I just wrapped up reading The Biology of Belief by Dr. Bruce Lipton. Lipton is bringing new thought to science and helping the layman to understand why the placebo effect works to heal at the cellular level. In short, you walk away from the book understanding how our beliefs shape the way we respond and what we achieve when it comes to progress - but not just in healing, in life! Our unconscious mind creates the beautiful automatic pilot that replaces our stomach lining every 72 hours, allows us to drive home without much thought, and whispers in our ear who we are and the life we deserve. So, if I believe I will lose myself in New York, I will create experiences, outcomes and results to support this belief. Ah…what else do I believe?
I realize I need to help the group to surface what they believe and understand how this is impacted their choices and progress in our work – in life. I need to invite them to remove the mask of the nemesis who holds our unworthy beliefs and unveil that whole, perfect and full expression of goodness who wants to express itself in life, and through our work.
Until now, I have been frustrated with how to help…more. But alas, I feel so silly. Of course I know how to help. It starts by helping me first, by questioning what I hold as true. Then, working with those who are interested in unearthing what they believe and changing it at the cellular level. Easy enough….
One shows up, but isn’t fully engaged in the work. As a result, there is minimal progress and a cloud of personal disappointment that joins us in the room whenever she arrives. I want to help. Hold her hand. Shake her to wake up, but I know we all hold the key to our own progress. Another is struggling with a shadow. It has followed her for years. It has become her companion and nemesis. Though it wears the mask of a jester, it will sometime unveil itself when she’s all alone – keeping her from offering her true beauty and gifts to this world. It keeps her goodness looking small in her own eyes. Yet another is sidetracked by her ability to open up to different ways of thinking and being. The question – what stops them -- all of us, at different times – from listening to our hearts and changing our path?
It strikes me that New York, in some ways, is the perfect environment for today’s contemplation. No, really. My husband and I have talked about spending more time in New York to see if it’s a place we might want to hang out once we get closer to retirement. We love Seattle, but New York has been calling my husband’s name ever since he decided to take a free ride for graduate school and pass up attending NYU; his only regret in life, he says.
As I think about the group, my thoughts wonder to visions of living in New York. I keep asking myself if I can be authentic, contemplative and who I am in New York, or whether I would lose myself in all the chaos, excitement and noise. You have to admit, there are mountains of distractions in New York.
Then it hits me, it’s my beliefs about New York that are getting in my way – not New York. This seems so ironic because I just wrapped up reading The Biology of Belief by Dr. Bruce Lipton. Lipton is bringing new thought to science and helping the layman to understand why the placebo effect works to heal at the cellular level. In short, you walk away from the book understanding how our beliefs shape the way we respond and what we achieve when it comes to progress - but not just in healing, in life! Our unconscious mind creates the beautiful automatic pilot that replaces our stomach lining every 72 hours, allows us to drive home without much thought, and whispers in our ear who we are and the life we deserve. So, if I believe I will lose myself in New York, I will create experiences, outcomes and results to support this belief. Ah…what else do I believe?
I realize I need to help the group to surface what they believe and understand how this is impacted their choices and progress in our work – in life. I need to invite them to remove the mask of the nemesis who holds our unworthy beliefs and unveil that whole, perfect and full expression of goodness who wants to express itself in life, and through our work.
Until now, I have been frustrated with how to help…more. But alas, I feel so silly. Of course I know how to help. It starts by helping me first, by questioning what I hold as true. Then, working with those who are interested in unearthing what they believe and changing it at the cellular level. Easy enough….
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
Building a House
As we’ve come to understand, career fulfillment revolves around the choices we make based on the information at our disposal. But, choices wrapped around our self-interests only can leave us – over time – feeling hollow and unsteady.
Therefore, how we define and strive for success needs to be balanced against the backdrop of life’s circumstances and what you want from life in the big scheme of things. In fact, there is a deep connectedness in what we want from life and our careers that we often take for granted. So, this month we had numerous exercises to bring our priorities to the surface, but by far - the house exercise was the most powerful for the group.
As we are learning, our careers do not sit in isolation from the rest of our lives – so taking a whole-life perspective becomes even more critical in this chapter. So, we started by defining what a balanced and fulfilled life looks like - using the metaphor of building a house.
Like most building projects, we started by creating a blueprint of the foundation, which ultimately holds the structure for more happiness and success in life. This meant plotting out what rooms belong in their house; family, relationships, career, financial, health and fitness, physical environment, fun and recreation, spiritual, etc. By design, the rooms are not predefined since our priorities are our own. For the same reason, the size and dimension of the rooms were also left to the discretion of each person. If we felt our family or marriage was pinnacle, it received a larger room. This meant we added rooms, took down walls, consolidated, or simplified our blueprint based on the priorities as we see them.
Once the rooms were defined, we also rated our satisfaction in each area of our lives. Though this was an important piece, it was the thoughtfulness that went into the construct of the blueprint that was awe inspiring. One person realized the “work room” was not connected to their house – at all – when she thought about her day job; a clear indication that her career was not feeding her soul and stood outside herself. So, she started to move outside of today’s reality and construct what the perfect structure would look like as she envisioned her ideal career fitting into her life.
Similarly, another participant constructed her house with her family in the largest room, only to discover this didn’t represent the significance she wanted from her marriage. They weren't one in the same for her and I think it's safe to say the group collectively melted when she told us of the conversation she had with her husband when she declared she wanted to “..build a special and separate room for their marriage..”
And finally, we had the person who realized her relationships were historically relegated to the “mud room” and that this was no longer acceptable. She was creating a new vision for this room and declaring the necessary space as she started her reconstruction project.
It was powerful stuff – because everyone was realizing it is almost impossible to look at their careers independent from the rest of life. The reality is – we all want meaning from our work - but this is only possible when we align our vision of success, priorities and values to ensure our careers are an extension of what we want from life, not the other way around.
Now that the house schematic is solid, it’s time to start building...I expect a run on hardhats in the next few days.
Therefore, how we define and strive for success needs to be balanced against the backdrop of life’s circumstances and what you want from life in the big scheme of things. In fact, there is a deep connectedness in what we want from life and our careers that we often take for granted. So, this month we had numerous exercises to bring our priorities to the surface, but by far - the house exercise was the most powerful for the group.
As we are learning, our careers do not sit in isolation from the rest of our lives – so taking a whole-life perspective becomes even more critical in this chapter. So, we started by defining what a balanced and fulfilled life looks like - using the metaphor of building a house.
Like most building projects, we started by creating a blueprint of the foundation, which ultimately holds the structure for more happiness and success in life. This meant plotting out what rooms belong in their house; family, relationships, career, financial, health and fitness, physical environment, fun and recreation, spiritual, etc. By design, the rooms are not predefined since our priorities are our own. For the same reason, the size and dimension of the rooms were also left to the discretion of each person. If we felt our family or marriage was pinnacle, it received a larger room. This meant we added rooms, took down walls, consolidated, or simplified our blueprint based on the priorities as we see them.
Once the rooms were defined, we also rated our satisfaction in each area of our lives. Though this was an important piece, it was the thoughtfulness that went into the construct of the blueprint that was awe inspiring. One person realized the “work room” was not connected to their house – at all – when she thought about her day job; a clear indication that her career was not feeding her soul and stood outside herself. So, she started to move outside of today’s reality and construct what the perfect structure would look like as she envisioned her ideal career fitting into her life.
Similarly, another participant constructed her house with her family in the largest room, only to discover this didn’t represent the significance she wanted from her marriage. They weren't one in the same for her and I think it's safe to say the group collectively melted when she told us of the conversation she had with her husband when she declared she wanted to “..build a special and separate room for their marriage..”
And finally, we had the person who realized her relationships were historically relegated to the “mud room” and that this was no longer acceptable. She was creating a new vision for this room and declaring the necessary space as she started her reconstruction project.
It was powerful stuff – because everyone was realizing it is almost impossible to look at their careers independent from the rest of life. The reality is – we all want meaning from our work - but this is only possible when we align our vision of success, priorities and values to ensure our careers are an extension of what we want from life, not the other way around.
Now that the house schematic is solid, it’s time to start building...I expect a run on hardhats in the next few days.
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